The nicknames we use for parents come in and out of fashion, year to year and season to season. At one time, men loved the word “Sire.” Sometimes, “Dad” was optional. What we do know is that the agreed-upon way to refer to a father these days is to call him, well, ‘Dad.’
But why did we abandon ‘father’ for father? The short answer is that things have gotten a little legal. But the reason we are moving away from the formal way is to accept what is natural to the language of children and parents. ‘Father’ comes from Proto-Indo-European “pÉ™ter” and Old English ‘fæder,’ meaning “child-bearer,” reflecting the baby talk sound “pa” and the phonetic shift from ‘p’ to ‘f’ in Middle English.
However, ‘father’ did not come from ‘father.’
Professor John H. McWhorter, a professor at Columbia University, says: “It comes from ‘daddy,’ a natural sound that comes out of children’s mouths as the second consonant sound after the natural ‘mommy.’ There, ‘father’ started in Proto-Indo-European with “puh-TAIR,” and the ‘puh’ part is the same thing: what started with ‘pa’ in ‘papa.’ The words Mom and Dad are the closest thing to international languages ​​because they are related to the formation of the mouth in babies rather than thought.”
There is also another main reason why this is reinforced over time. Emie Tittnich, an expert at the University of Pittsburgh, speaking to Living Sciencenoted that parents often avoid using pronouns such as ‘I’ or ‘you’ to avoid confusing their children with abstract concepts early on. “‘Parents will use [‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’] to help their children learn the roles and show the relationship, ‘mother and me,’.” Tittnich says: “It usually takes a child to understand that the same person can be called by two different names.”
The agreed-upon nature of these linguistic norms means that as American society has become more pluralistic over time, we’re moving (at least in this instance) away from a word that reflects the status quo based on rigid notions of class and religion—one of the meanings of ‘fæder’ is the Old English ‘higher body,’ according to the Online Etymology Dictionary. As a result, we often cringe when we hear a child call a parent ‘daddy.’
However, it is not unanimous. We spoke to six dads who choose – or stick with – ‘daddy’ instead of ‘daddy.’ Some do it as a tribute to their father; others do it to sound authoritative. Some do it because their children like it. They all have their reasons and, perhaps, deep down, some are big fans of the Proto-Indo-European language. Here’s what they said.
That’s what the Father loves
Sometimes I worry that it sounds a little loud, but that’s what my dad always asked us to call him, and it felt like it was important to me to keep that going. No one in my family has ever had a problem with it. I think you can still be ‘daddy’ and be called ‘daddy,’ if that makes sense. It is actually semantic, in that way, but it is also more than semantics. – John, Baltimore, MD
That’s What My Baby Decided To Call Me
It’s less of a request or demand or anything, but when we were teaching my oldest that everything was called, we’d just say ‘this is your mother’ and ‘here’s your father,’ and he loved to say that, too. So we kept it. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think it was incredibly cool to have our little guy come up to us and say, “daddy, mommy, please use the bathroom,” or what have you. But like everything else, I don’t care about anything that seems natural to my kids and makes them happy. – Eric, Austin, Texas
We’ve Always Been a More Traditional Family
My son didn’t start until he was older. I think he thought it sounded polite, even if it was just a professional job. We’ve always been a traditional family, the way we behave, I guess you can tell. So maybe this was his way of taking that a little bit, or contributing to that. My wife teases me about it sometimes. I should clarify, he is usually the one who introduces me to other people that way. ‘This is my father, have you met my father?’ etc. – Patrick, Twin Cities, MN
It’s like Sticking
Two years ago, my oldest daughter, who is 21 years old, started calling me ‘daddy’ and as strange as I found it, I didn’t have it at all. Now, my four-year-old calls me “daddy” and I think I have a new title now. As long as I can’t be called ‘Henry,’ I’m fine with it. – Henry, Boston, MA
More Authoritative
I have eight children—three boys and five girls. I always asked to be called ‘Dad’ not to be a dictator but because the house can be chaotic, as you can imagine, and my wife and I felt it was a more authoritative label and kept things less chaotic. ‘Please don’t touch your father’s golf clubs’ has a better ring to it, I think. – Elliott, Charlotte, NC
Includes a Sense of Responsibility for Me
I love that my children call me ‘daddy,’ because of the responsibility it instills in me. Your ‘father’ or ‘father’ is there to lend you a car, your ‘father’ is there to raise you, and protect you and make sure you have the tools you need to succeed in life. When my children call me ‘daddy,’ it instills that sense of purpose in me every day, and reminds me that it’s up to me to make their world a better place to grow up in. Sam, Alachua Country, FL
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