In the 1970s and 80s, when the Nordic countries started to introduce shared parental leave, it was not uncommon to see a father helping out. Staying at home with children was considered women’s work; men who did so were considered unmanly. In Sweden, those who stayed at home were called “velor fathers,” a term used for men who wore pajamas.
A few decades later, Nordic fathers, who wear pajamas with pride, have become shining examples of involved fathers. Swedish fathers, in particular, are affectionately known as “lattes pappas” – a term synonymous with a young father who is seen drinking small coffees and eating baked goods (arrive) while supporting a sleeping child tied to the chest. The myths stand still: A survey on the status of paternity leave among Nordic fathers confirms their place at the front of the pack of modern, involved fathers. But it also shows that they have work to do in terms of fully embracing their roles.
Produced by Promundo, the “State of Nordic Fathers” report is based on a survey of 7515 people, evenly distributed between Sweden, Denmark, Iceland, Finland, and Norway. This was done in collaboration with Promundo’s “State of the World’s Fathers” 2019, a major report on fathers from 40 countries about fatherhood, gender identity, and paternity leave, and contains responses from more than 3,099 fathers and 1,646 mothers. The purpose of the study was to compare the attitudes and opinions of parents who took different leave.
The view of recess has changed since the 70s and 80s. Parents in the Nordic countries, according to research, believe that parental leave is no longer only for mothers, as 75% of men and women say it should be shared between parents. Nordic men are also psychologically conditioned to take part in raising children. Between 89 percent (Denmark) and 96 percent (Sweden) of fathers not only said they felt capable of being caregivers but also wanted to be more active in the first months and years of their children’s lives. Between 86 and 94 percent of all parents interviewed agreed that it is the father’s responsibility to be more involved in child care.
Why? Men know that playing the role of caregiver is rewarding. The report confirms the fact that men who take longer paternity leave (all countries allow 40 weeks or more, with Sweden offering the longest at 69 weeks) have better relationships with their partners and children and greater overall life satisfaction. Fathers who took longer paternity leave were also less likely to adhere to traditional masculinity norms, less likely to rely on a female partner, and more likely to seek information about childcare from sources such as parenting books and doctors. For men living in the Nordic countries, all of whom have spent decades on social media defending fatherhood, these benefits are well known.
That doesn’t mean everyone is taking advantage. There’s one failing that Nordic dads share with the rest of the world: They don’t take their paternity leave. “Finnish fathers on average take only 11 percent of the paid paternity leave they are entitled to after the birth of a child,” the report said. “Although the number is almost the same in Denmark, in Norway it is around 20 percent and in Sweden and Iceland it is around 30 percent.” On the other hand, about 80 percent of mothers take more than six months of leave, compared to about 5 percent of fathers.
What gives? However, research shows that many men who did not take paternity leave did so because they thought it would have a negative impact on their jobs and relationships with co-workers. Those who say they have understanding bosses, however, are more likely to take more time off.
In addition, gender roles are still to come. Mothers in the study often said that fathers should be more involved in child care, planning, planning play dates, etc. (85 percent of Swedish mothers say as much). And almost all mothers and fathers in the study agreed that fathers and mothers are more involved in all three types of child care.
When it comes to home equity, however, there are differences in people’s perceptions of reality. While 55 percent of fathers say they share the day-to-day planning equally, only 33 percent of mothers agree, saying they do most or all of the work instead (64 percent). Between 66 and 70 percent of fathers say they share physical and emotional care equally with their partners, with only half of mothers saying it’s an equal split.
Of course, this is just a vacuum failure. Compared to the rest of the world, the Nordic fathers are miles ahead. In the US, for example, men have increased the time spent on housework and caring for family members in recent decades, but women still do almost twice as much at home.
So, while the Nordic countries have their own forward-thinking approach to parental leave and fathers are committed to being excellent caregivers, no place is perfect. Some men aren’t willing to take a break if it hurts their posture and may overestimate how much they throw around the house. Even with pads provided, Nordic dads have some work to do. Not just like the rest of us.
This article was originally published
